Archive | October 4, 2011

Why can’t parties have more couches?

Me smiling at the cocktail party, in my head I'm screaming, "take the F--ing picture, I need to sit down!"

I have recently been to two parties, (some of you were at those parties)  two Saturdays in a row. I know. That’s a lot for a PTA mom from the ‘burbs. I’m super fun, what can I say? At both parties I ended up removing my shoes at some point in the night.

If you’ve seen Vlogger (that’s video blogger), Jenna Marbles on YouTube, she makes a video about how bad white girls are in the club. I personally think all girls- white, hispanic, black, asian are bad in clubs once you put a group of them together. But she goes on to describe, and I won’t include the link, because she uses the F word too many times and that would offend some of you, but she describes how white girls get so drunk they take off their shoes. They need to commit to their shoes until they get home. NOT take them off at the club because they are so drunk. Not ’til drunk do we part’, but ’til home do we part’, as she puts it.

Here’s the thing- yes, I took off my shoes. NO, I wasn’t drunk. My shoes were frickin’ KILLING my feet people!! Yes, I’m a slave to fashion. BUT HELL NO, I’m not wearing Birkenstocks to a cocktail party.  These were Cole Haan Nike Airs for crying out loud!! They are supposed to be comfortable. I’m supposed to be able to like, run a 50 yard dash in them. Yes, they are 4 inches high, but STILL, they have Nike Air technology!! Apparently, my feet don’t know this. I have neuromas, (horribly painful nerve tumors between the bones in my feet) and plantar fasciitis (short muscles in my arches) so any shoes I wear without my clunky, old lady, orthotics that I’ve had since I was 23, will make my feet hurt.

James always hates when I complain in my shoes. But standing hours and hours in heels is painful. Men don’t know this. Standing still for anyone is uncomfortable, but is it painful for everyone? I don’t think so. It’s just not fair that we are supposed to look hot, show off our legs, wear cute clothes and endure this pain.

So ladies- we must band together on this:

Here’s my suggestion- it would be nice if parties had more couches. I will continue to wear heels to events. They look better. Period. BUT, if I had the opportunity to sit down at these parties, I would be fine. Let’s not keep standing in the kitchen- let’s go to the living room. If it’s a cocktail party, don’t just make us stand-   be sure to supply plenty of seating. Even if it’s a lawn chair for crying out loud! Let us sit!  I did end up sitting at one of the little cocktail tables with a stool and so did a bunch of other ladies once I did. SEE?? We were thinking the same thing!! I didn’t mean for this to turn into a rant, I just think sitting would be nice.

Now if there’s dancing, that’s a WHOLE different story….

My shoes at the first party that I didn't commit to.